The sweetest lies
by Dancing Mask
Summary: Some lies can be as sweet as cakes and teddy bears. Usopp X Perona fluff, set in the real-world.


Disclaimer: One Piece belongs to Oda-sensei, I make no money off his characters, etc. Although with doujin circles, you'd think stories like these really don't need disclaimers... Regardless, please enjoy the Usopp X Perona love~ Note this is set in the real world, not that it matters much.

* * *

The couch seat was warm and his back was starting to get uncomfortable. In any other situation the boy would have gotten up and stretched to solve both, but that was the last thing he wanted to do in this moment. The source of his situation- and happiness- was the tall, wide-eyed girl currently leaning against him on the cramped two-seater couch. Her name was Perona.

Perona was almost his height thanks to amazing legs that were currently hidden by striped socks that extended- in black-and-white zebra colours- all the way past her thigh, ending under a scarlet mini-skirt. Her hair was usually long and blonde, temporarily dyed pink for a party later that night.

"Usopp, are you even paying attention?"

"I'm winning, aren't I?" The boy grinned as he looked away from her, quickly countering attacks and earning another point next to his name. For someone who enjoyed video games, she sure sucked at them. Even his average skills were enough to keep the wins steadily stacked in his favour, regardless what kind of game they played together. When they played fairly, that was.

"Round... Two... Begin!" The announcer blared, as Usopp quickly leapt into a series of spinning kicks that threw her off guard. Perona's counter-attack was to shift on the couch, one long leg resting across his lap as she stretched.

"H-hey! No fair!" accused the curly-haired boy, suddenly finding it very difficult to concentrate on anything outside the realm of their couch.

"I wouldn't stop you from trying the same tactic," Perona pointed out, sticking her tongue out at him as she continued to hammer his character.

Usopp shook his head, trying to focus, as she wriggled her foot and pressed herself even closer to him. The body heat he was feeling- and giving off- was maddening.

"Yes! Victory!" His opponent leaped off the couch, fists pumping in the air as she danced.

"That one doesn't count," Usopp challenged, crossing his arms as the 'battle over!' tune sounded. She always did this- their games were a match of skill against sexuality, so to speak. They hadn't really talked about it, but she won her share of games through tricking him just like that, and it put them on a more equal footing. Once he'd lost a headshot when she took her top off, although she'd merely been teasing the boy, wearing a singlet underneath.

He was completely ignored in favour of Perona's stomach, which was demanding things again.

"Oh, and see if you have any chocolate milk as well!" her bubbly voice carried into the kitchen over the light rain as Usopp began searching for any cake they might still have. His parents probably thought he'd become a sugar junkie, considering how many times Perona had snuck over and snacked at his place. Today was like most weekends- when he had the house to himself Perona turned up unannounced, even when he _didn't_ know he was home alone, waking him up forcefully so they could spend time together.

"How do you stay thin with all that sugary crap you eat?" the long-nosed boy wondered, more to himself.

"Cute food does that to cute people," declared the former-blonde.

Balancing a plate of Black Forest cake, along with a muffin that appeared to be strawberry, raspberry and boysenberry (_like anyone could tell the difference_), Usopp returned to find the couch full. Perona had laid out, head on the armrest as her feet kicked idly off the other end, leaving him no space.

"Am I allowed to sit on my couch?" he asked sarcastically. Dark eyes looked at him carefully behind eyeliner, as if appraising the boy before answering. He wasn't exactly dressed sharp- brown corduroy pants and a yellow T-shirt- but that probably wasn't what she was judging him on. Usopp found a lot less to complain about with his companion- the way she was lying across the couch had lifted her shirt up, revealing a flat waist and a navel piercing with a tiny bat on the end. It was hard to argue when she claimed she was cute, he mused.

"You can sit on the floor," Perona graciously decided. Usopp grumbled, leaning against the couch where she had pointed as he changed the channel awkwardly with one hand. The girl leaned over him, relieving the tanned boy of the cake as he switched between old movies idly.

"So, are we gonna get going to that party? I hear Luffy's older brother set him up, they got loads of illegal fireworks," Usopp waved his hands as he spoke excitedly.

"Nah, let's go in a little bit," Perona disagreed.

"How come?" He looked up, leaning his head back at the girl with eyebrows raised quizzically.

"Because I want to," declared the teenager, moving on the couch once more.

Long legs suddenly landed on the floor, Perona swinging upright on the couch. Her thighs were either side of the boy, his head now resting against her lap. Usopp grinned towards the TV, reading her actions well. She wanted to stay here with him, although she'd never admit it out loud. The girl leaned forward, now on the edge of the cushion, body arching as soft hands parted his hair. Ruby lips pressed gently against his forehead, before the owner of those lips tumbled forward. Usopp found himself laughing as he shifted, causing her to land awkwardly on top of him.

"Not cute!" the pink-haired teen pouted as she tried to right herself, Usopp's mischievous grin contrasted as she shot daggers at him with her eyes.

"That's because you're the cute one here," he pointed out, sneaking in another kiss before she was ready.

"Don't try and flatter me, Usopp!" Perona stood up, crossing her arms as she looked at him pointedly.

"It's not flattery, it's true," he said reasonably. "You're the second-cutest girl I know!"

"_Second_?" She drew out the word slowly and clearly, as if it could explode at any moment if mishandled.

"Yup!" Usopp grinned an idiot grin back at the girl, knowing it would provoke her even more. "You know that girl in our class, what's-her-name? Sits at the back?"

"Nami! Are you seriously telling me you think that _whore_ is cute?" Perona was pissed now- any more and he knew she'd just leave without talking to him.

"Nah, I meant the girl next to her, Alvida!" There was a small pause, the only sound in the room the quietly lashing rain outside. Perona stared at Usopp, expression unreadable through her eyelashes.

"Horohorohoro!" Her deep laughter echoed through the house as Perona fell to the ground, arms wrapped around her waist as she failed to hold back the laughter. "You tell the best jokes, Usopp!" Alvida being the ugliest hag they knew, a girl who looked closer to forty then their teenage years- she was perfect for the joke. He grinned back, relief in his eyes as he realised Perona wasn't going to kill him for that one. He slid over on the cheap carpet, laying beside the girl.

"So, how about we pick up where we were?" He made to kiss her, eyes closed as he leaned in, only to meet a stripey-socked foot in the face.

"Too late; your chance is gone!" The petite girl kicked him a few more times for good measure, even as she smiled and talked lightly with him. The combination was unnerving.

"Well, we have a party to go to, don't we?" She headed towards the entrance, pulling on a red boot to his dismay.

"Hey, I was kidding, no need to be so cold," the boy flailed as he tried to reassure her.

"Oh, I'm not mad at all!" Perona's laugh tinkled in his ears once again as she grabbed her bag and umbrella, leaving him on the floor alone. She might not seem angry, but he knew he wouldn't even hold her hand for the rest of the week, chances were.

There had to be a word for that, where a person could overreact loudly at small things like a child, yet bottle up their feelings and mess with someone for revenge just as easily. It was so confusing to deal with...

"Feminine," he muttered, Usopp surprising himself with the sudden insight. It made perfect sense that someone could be immature and childish, yet complicated and evil in the same moment. Perfect sense if said person in question was a women, that was.

"Why thank you, I am feminine," Perona smiled at him, shutting the door on his nose.

"Ow! Not in public you're not," grumbled the curly-haired boy. "This is why Sanji still laughs at me and says we're not really dating- he never sees you act nicely."

"I can't help it if your lies get in the way of my cuteness," she sniffed, unfolding a large umbrella.

"I'm not a liar!"

"That's the biggest lie you've ever told!" Usopp gazed into the distance at this, expression serious.

"I'm sure I've told a bigger lie then that before..." Perona groaned in response.

"Don't try and outdo yourself with big lies, that'd take forever. Just stay quiet for me, okay?"

"How nice of you to ask," the male dead-panned.

They continued to bicker like this as they stepped out into the street, huddled close together under the umbrella. Their actions spoke louder then their words as they walked together, hand in hand. It was a good moment for both of them, and Usopp hoped it would last forever.

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A/N: This is seriously all the stuff my brain can think of at the moment, thanks to Valentines Day :3 Perona's such a sweet tsundere, isn't she? Not a piece I planned, but feel free to constructively criticise and review anyway~


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